


ever since you left (you still won’t leave me)

by TsukiDragneel (i_was_human)



Series: you and i, we're free-falling, baby [7]
Category: Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School
Genre: Despair, Despair Sakakura Juzo, Internalized Homophobia, Introspection, M/M, POV Second Person, Suicidal Thoughts, Unrequited Love, it's juzo what did you expect
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:54:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 376
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23417065
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/i_was_human/pseuds/TsukiDragneel
Summary: In the purest sense of the word, despair is relative. Despair is forced love, wandering hands, candy-sweet breath, scratches on backs, Munakata Kyosuke-
Relationships: Munakata Kyosuke/Sakakura Juzo
Series: you and i, we're free-falling, baby [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1404898
Comments: 2
Kudos: 44





	ever since you left (you still won’t leave me)

Despair is-

well.

In the purest sense of the word, despair is relative. Despair is forced love, wandering hands, candy-sweet breath, scratches on backs, _Munakata Kyosuke-_

and you are wrong.

He stares down at you, as perfect and put-together as ever, and _god_ , you wonder, _why can’t you stop loving him_?

”How long?” he whispers, and you know the question isn’t _about that_ , but it’s never _about that_ , so you answer it that way anyways.

”As long as I’ve known you. Maybe longer.”

His eyes widen, the realization that despair is all you’ve ever been washing over him-

but that is your despair, isn’t it?

Gazes lingering too long in the locker rooms, dreams of men instead of women, _your heart beating for Munakata instead of Yukizome_ , and yes, you decide, your love for Munakata is your despair.

All of this - the despair washing over you, holding your mind in its claws - that’s merely a byproduct.

”I wanted to die,” you admit, and that’s not a lie. “But I kept living anyways, ‘cause I had to protect you.”

If not for Munakata, you’d be dead.

You’d be happy.

And yet (and yet, and yet, and yet) you managed to fall deeper and deeper into the tantalizing ocean of _despair_ , fell into Munakata Kyosuke’s eyes, and you fell.

God, how you fell.

”I should’ve died there,” you whisper, tears stinging your eyes (and you didn’t know you had any left to shed, in all honesty). “I should be dead.”

He doesn’t argue.

(this rejection - what you feared, all you knew, each word a shackle dragging you deeper, deeper, yet deeper, each man an added sin to carry, each glance, each stolen moment a failure, _you love him and you shouldn't_ -)

”I’m sorry,” you whisper, staring up at Munakata’s alabaster eyes. “I’m sorry I love you.”

If this story had a happy ending, he’d kiss you.

But this is a tragedy.

And, you dimly muse, watching as Munakata Kyosuke (the man you love, still love, shouldn't love) pulls his sword from your chest, perhaps you never knew him at all.

(your heart was his to do with as he pleased, a rotting, broken organ replete with sin -

and he chose to break it.

did you expect anything else?)

**Author's Note:**

> title from “broken hearts club”


End file.
